El Asphalt beyed7ak leeh? Abo el solom saye2 3aleeh.

Finally and after about 5 or 6 months of intentions I did it, I went to a driving school and I actually sat behind the wheel and moved a car (lololololoyyyyyyyyyyy).

First, I called a driving school which has it’s cars parked at Mostafa Mahmoud square if you passeed by “El 3ogail” you’d probably see it, I asked for the driving lessons timing and pricing and the guy told me it’s 6 classes on fiat 128 with 120 L.E if “3andak fekra” if not then it’s 10 classes with 200 L.E, when I asked him what’s “el fekra”? he told me that “you drove before” :I, why would I go to a DRIVING school if I already know how to drive he said that this is if you are practicing only!!!

Any way I called another company which is in Sphinx square, they offer 6 classes on fiat 128 with 135 L.E, they have 2 trainers only working on the weekends and thanks Allah that I booked with the friendly one.

I took 2 classes till now, I learned to move forward and backward, put on the neutral, first and second gears and starting the contact then the march. I didn’t know that the car can move while you are not pressing the petrol pedal (forward and backward) also I didn’t think that the petrol pedal is so sensitive. On the second class the trainer told me that in Europe when they made the first car they wanted it to be like a human with the motor as the brain and the fuel as the food so I have to be very gentle to my car, I guess he was high .

One thing I learned from those lessons is that whenever I see a person in a driving school’s car I would leave him alone and stay away from the car by 10 meters at least to give him space not stand infront of the car while he’s trying to move it :@#!$%:@#.

I guess that it would take me some time to be able to drive, listen to the music, talk to other people on board, check out “el mozaz” and watch the road at the same time.

Agouza

It isn’t easy to write this post as Agouza isn’t just a place to live in for me, it’s the place to live in. I’ve been living in Agouza my whole life never moved on to some place else. I guess that what makes a place special to any one is the memories you’ve got there whether you felt down, broke a bone, found some money, sneaked in to smoke or drink something, …

So being in the same place for 22 years gives you a lot of memories, now when I pass by my high school and walk on the streets surrounding it (it is in Dokki) I know that if I haven’t been in the street I would have tears coming down for remembering what we used to do after the school the place where we used to sit beside the internet cafe, the shop which sold sandwiches of (foul be lamon) for 25 piasters, the cafe that we occasionally sat in after the school and others so how would I feel if I left Agouza after 22 years (and more to come inshaalah) of memories not just 3 years, I can’t imagine that.

One of the most beautiful things about Agouza is that where ever you go (study, work) you’ll find people from here and there might be just 2 or 3 streets away from you. At college we were 7 from Agouza separated by 15 min walk maximum, At work there are 3 from Agouza (currently 2 as one of them got married and moved) and this time we are separated by 3 min walk.

Another thing is that almost all the public transportation (except for the Metro) pass by Agouza and from here you can find direct transportation to many places, In my graduation project I was working in a friend’s apartment at Zahraa Madinet Nasr my transportation was just a green microbus from Ne3ma to the apartment while the others had to get to Ramsis then take a microbus from there.

Agouza is also famous for it’s cafes that gathered us many times including El Gawhara, El Pacha, El Bostan and October there we have studied, played cards, held meeting for graduation projects or for after college projects which never started and whenever we think of a reunion between the guys a cafe in Agouza is the first suggestion.  Also we shouldn’t forget Ne3ma that provided us with breakfast, lunch and dinner ( “Sharp” applause ).

Sports life in Agouza is good also, you can go to a Gym I know 3 of them, you can go fishing from 6th of October bridge, If you want to jog you can start a beautiful lap from 6th of October bridge to Kasr el Nil bridge to the Opera then back to 6th of October (it’ll take about 20 min. non stop )

So people of Agouza whom I don’t know be proud of where you live (whom I know are already proud of it).

أزمة سعادتك ايه؟

و السنين تيجي و ترحل مرة أصعب مرة أسهل النهارده و أنا في المترو كان فيه واحد جنبي فاتح ال لاب توب علي وثيقه  عنوانها “أزمة المسرح المصري” حتي المسرح المصري في أزمة.

أفتكر لو فيه سؤال بيقول ضع كلمة أزمة في جملة مفيده يبقي الحل انك مجرد تفتح أي جريده و تكتب العناوين بتاعتها, من ساعة ما شفت العنوان ده لحد منزلت من المترو و أنا عمال أعد في أزمات 2009 اللي مكملة معانا في 2010 ده غير الحبه الجداد.

أزمة المرور و الزحمة و المواصلات, أزمة الاسكان و الضرائب, أزمة التعليم و الصحة و التأمينات, أزمة المحاميين و التجاريين و المهندسين و القضاه و الصحفيين و الشغالات و الزباليين, أزمة الفن و الثقافه و الذوق العام, أزمة التلوث و الزباله و العشوائيات, أزمة الحر و البرد و التراب و الامطار, أزمة الجواز و الطلاق و العنوسه, أزمة الشباب و البنات و كبار السن, أزمة الانفلوانزا و الحمي و السرطان, أزمة الخشب و الحديد و الأسمنت و الكوب و الزلط, أزمة الزراعة و الصناعة و الاقتصاد, أزمة الرئاسة و الخلافة و الانتخابات و الدستور و المظاهرات, أزمة الجزائر و ايران و فلسطين و تركيا و السعودية و قطر, أزمة الشاي و السكر و الزيت و لبن الأطفال أزمة الحجاب و النقاب و الملابس المكشوفة و الضيقة, أزمة التفكير و التكفير, أزمة المسئولين و المنفضين.

كفاية لحد كده و كل سنة و انتم طيبيين.

Note: I think word press wasn’t designed to write posts in arabic and english at the same post as I spent an hour trying to copy this post from a word file (usually I write in a word file then copy to the blog) finally I had to remove some english words to publish this.

أحزان الطريق

القصة دي حصلت و أنا في الكلية (سنة تانية أو تالتة) بكتبها هنا علشان بقالي مدة عايز أكتب قصة قصيرة بس مش لاقي فكرة و مش عارف أبدأ منين فقولت أقضيها تجارب شوية, أقول اللي حصل و أحاول أوصف تفكيري كان عامل ازاي يمكن بعد أما أكتب كام تجربة من دول و ايدي تاخد علي كتابة العربي من تاني – أنا من أيام ثانوي مكتبتش موضوع كامل بالعربي فينك يا أسئلة التعبير؟- ألاقي فكرة حلوة و أكتبها كويس

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الجامعه؟
انبسطت ان العربية كانت جديدة نوعا ما (سيتروين), أيامها كانت التاكسيات الجديدة مش موجوده و كانت الشاهين هي التاكسي النظيف, أنا اتعلمت اني مركبش تاكسي قديم الا لو كنت فعلا مستعجل علشان دايما بيبقي السواق راجل كبير والعربية مطلعه عينه و غالبا بيبقي اتبهدل علي كبر يعني في السن ده و شغال سواق تاكسي ممكن ايام شبابه كان لاقي شغل حلو و ممكن طول عمره كان سواق تاكسي, بس في وقت ما الدنيا اتغيرت ووصل لكده, فدايما تلاقيه بيتخانق في الاجره ده غير انك بتتعب في ركوب العربيه علشان بيبقي في أصوات غريبة طالعه و مع كل حدث في الطريق ( مطب, فرملة جامدة, …) في صوت جديد بيقدم نفسه, ده غير رائحة البنزين و ساعات رائحة العربية كلها.

هز رأسه
كويس انه مسألنيش السؤال الغبي “جامعة القاهرة؟” أكيد انا لو كنت رايح جامعة عين شمس يبقي هقول “جامعة عين شمس” انما في العجوزه و بقول جامعه تبقي القاهرة. ركبت معاه, هو كان راجل مليان شوية و شعره خفيف متكلمناش طول الطريق انما جئنا عند كوبري الدقي مش فاكر ايه اللي فتح الكلام
بس كنا بنتكلم عن التحاليل و المستشفيات لقيته بيحكيلي عن ابنه في مستشفي معين بيعمل غسيل كلي و ساعات نقل دم و لقيت عينيه بتدمع.
أنا قولت في دماغي “عارفكم” دول كلمتين علشان أديله فلوس زياده, دايما و انا بتكلم مع سواقين التاكسيات مبحبش افتح موضوع في حاجه عن الفلوس علشان عارف انها هترسي ان البلد مفيهاش فلوس و هو حالته صعبة و لازم أنا اللي أساعده.
طبعا هو عمال يتكلم عن ابنه و أنا بحاول أطيب خاطره و الدموع ابتدأ يبقي معاها صوت عياط مكتوم و أنا بقوله اهدي مش كده ربنا هيشفيه و جوايا حاسس انه بيمثل بس لقيت الموضوع طول شوية من اخر كوبري الدقي للكلية.

وصلنا الكلية كان هدي شوية و قولت بقي هنا هتبان كل حاجه و هشوف كان بيمثل ولا لأ, طلعت الفلوس من جيبي و اديتهاله, مبصش فيها أصلا, حطها في التابلوه و داس بنزين, ساعتها صعب عليا ابنه و قولت يارب اشفيه.

Technology bites

I’ve learned what’s behind all those ads and promotions saying that technology helps us to communicate, connect, socialize and get closer everyday, earlier at work our team (4 people) was in a meeting with the process head at our company and then we needed somebody’s else opinion about something so the process head who was sitting beside us got him on the phone and started asking, our team leader wanted to get into the conversation between the process and the other guy to explain something.
So the process head used a technological feature in his HTC to make a call conference between the three of them and in order to hear each other clearly they had to keep a distance.
Eventually they were about 10-15 meters far after they were talking face to face and may be they had sentences in their call like “sorry I didn’t hear you could you say it again?”.
And that’s what is meant by “getting closer”.

IC – People

Those are photos of people I don’t know but I think that each one of them was thinking of something very deep – relatively – that he felt disconnected from the outside world (eh el kalam el kebeer dah ).
Sorry if the quality of the images wasn’t good as the digital zoom of my mobile phone camera sucks.

IC- Al Sultan Hassan Mosque

That visit took about 2 hours to reach the mosque and about 45 min inside it, those 2 hours were the worst in my life as it was extremely hot day, the streets were crowded although it was a Saturday and I depended on the people to get me there (I faced a lot of Fatawa), any way the 45 mins made the rest of the day.

Simply that mosque made me feel PEACE.

Pop Quiz

The world is full of unknowns, every time I watch a documentary about any thing in nature, medicine even wars they end up the movie by saying that there are a lot of unknowns waiting to be discovered by some genius “انا و ان كنت الخير زمانه, لآت بما لم يستطعه الأوائل”, for me there are some mysteries that I can’t find an explanation for and I don’t think I’ll be able to understand them one day “عجيبة عجيبة, عجيبة و مش عجيبة”, I’d like to share some of those mysteries with you and please if you have an explanation for any of them let me know.

1. Who the @:!#*& calls the TV ads of 0900xxxx to get a ring tone for his mobile, he can simply download the song and put it on the mobile without paying any thing, or does any one believe that he’ll get $1000…. for answering a stupid question that a 6 years old kid can, or what makes some one with a weight problem, psychological problem, … etc, believe that calling 0900 and listening to a recorded message will solve the problem. I’m sure that those people exist as the ads increase every day but I didn’t see any of them till today to ask.

2. Why is a 15 min or 10 min walk distance requires to get in a crowded microbus or waste your moeny on a taxi?? I’m not talking about old people I’m talking about youth in their 20’s and they are not late for any thing.

3. Again who the @:!#*& watches the Turkish TV series mohanned we nour, sanawat el daya3, ….etc, I found out that those series never end, every time I open up MBC 4 I fing one of those shows, one time I tried to watch some episode of mohanned and noor as I heared a lot about it and some news papers reported that women got divorced because of this series, after 5 min I switched the channel as there was so much naive for me. check  point (1) I think there’s a connection.

4. Why can’t I find a line infront of any outlet in any place (governemental. cinemas, parties, companies, …) there is always some “fetek” that comes from the side saying that he just wants to ask for something, I can’t understand him all the others in the line probably want to ask for the same thing,  why is he better than them??

If you knew the answer to any of those questions let me know and I’ll give you a special reward “اجري بسرعة يا واد يا حسين, هاتلنا منه باكو و اتنين”.

Es2al Megarab – Downtown

If you want to walk on “Kasr-El-Nil” bridge walk on the left side (the one at Shepherd and Casino El nil) as it’s usually less crowded than the other one (I got this tip from a friend), If you are walking on 6th of October bridge from downtown towards Agouza walk on the right sidewalk (the one at El Saraya boat and Maspiro building).

Don’t enter Rivoli Cinema and If you did DON’T enter Rivoli 2

If you were going to enter Metro Cinema I suggest that you enter Metro 3 (it’s tickets outlet is inside the cinema to the right) Don’t enter the Metro cinema with the outer ticket outlet

As for Oden cinema the best show screen is Odeon 1 it is the biggest one, one of the other 2 screens has a wall at the right so if you booked try to select a seat to the left.

try not to walk in the streets before 12 am especially talaat harb  and foad street.

it’s better if you don’t go there before 12 am in general.

For the food there aren’t much good shops/restaurants there, there’s “El Kazaz” restaurant at talaat-harb square, you can eat “foul, batates, baba ghanoug, tameya” from there they also used to have nice “sogo2″ and “meraba bel 2eshta” but I’m not sure if they are still good. Also there’s a “fatatrey” near Abdeen Palace I guess it’s called “Been el quasreen”.

Lately there’s a phenomena going on which is cafe’s at the roof of some buildings, there’s one at talaat-harb street and another one at foad street,  I went to the one at talaat-harb it is good at summer as there is nice breeze up there but the drinks suck!.

3 years of cinema

Recently I was sitting with my friends at Ossama (“ahwa” at downtown) some one suggested that we go to a cinema, after some discussions we agreed to go to “El fara7″ movie and we headed to “Talaat-Harb” street to see what cinema is showing it, First we went to Odeon although it wasn’t shown but I noticed that  massive changes were made there. They put a metal bars at the entrance of the tickets area with one opening to allow people to enter (it could fit for two people to pass at the same time maximum), there were some “amn markazy” soldiers standing behind the bar and a kind of “mo7′ber” inside yelling at the people to buy the tickets quickly, stay in the line and If you are not buying the ticket get out of here and they let the people get in and buy the tickets on groups. When I saw this I felt that Odeon became a military site or a barrack that ordinary people can’t get into easily and they need “amn markazy” to organize them.

After that we went to Metro, the movie was playing there so we went to buy the tickets, amazingly it seems that the people at Metro found that audience is not mature enough to choose a seat number or perhaps they are out of papers showing the seats or the seats ran out of numbers, any way they decided to just give you a ticket without numbers and inside you select the seat using first-come first-serve (In Egypt it is Biggest-come First-serve )

After I got in there we found some seats at the back that seemed good  we headed there and while I was preparing to sit I found a vomit on the seat (I’m not kidding) and when the people at the cinema came to clean it (that was after about 1/2 hour when one of the audience sitting at the other side of the vomit called them to clean it) they guy just wiped it with a towel they he put some liquid soap on the seat and floor that just increased the “3ak” at the place.

The next day I went to Galaxy Cinema to watch “The Taking of Pelham 123″ although the audience was relatively small the movie was showing, In such case at downtown cinemas you’ll find the poster of the movie outside the cinema but when you want to buy a ticket you’ll find that the movie isn’t showing,  about the place it was clean, clear sound, clear image and of course we picked our seats at the entrance.

2 or 3 years ago when we decide to go to a cinema and some guy says that he’ll not go to downtown as it’s “be2a” and you can’t hear anything from the movie I used to make fun of him and describe him as “farfour”, at that time cinemas like Odeon and Cosmos were organized, not perfect but at least I can buy a ticket and watch the movie.

Also I remember that I went to Metro some time in the past when it had only 1 showroom I went to a movie with my father, The showroom was so big like a theater and they were showing cartoon movies (good ones) before the movie started.

I don’t know why did Downtown cinemas turn into this shape, may be because of Al-Fitr feast when there was harrasements at Dina’s movie or the increasing number of un-employed graduates that find nothing to do and those cinemas are one of the things affordable to them or may be that’s what Egypt is turning to in general.

Note: ticket price at downtown cinemas is 15 L.E (some cinemas like Miami, Rivoli have 10 L.E tickets) while in galaxy it is 30 L.E.